Avoiding the Emotional Outburst

By: Bill Vogel, PHR
Date: 7/30/2018
VirturalHRPros.com   
 
Leaders that understand and manage their emotions have a higher degree of success than relying only on experience. Science journalist, Daniel Goleman author of the book, Emotional Intelligence, explains that a high Emotional Quotient (EQ) is a better indicator of success than having a high IQ. Emotional intelligence has several learned components, but the most important piece for leaders is learning to control emotions. It happens to the best and most proficient managers in the working world, something triggers a regrettable outburst that could have been prevented. Here a few EQ self-perceptions steps that can help avert these awkward situations:
 

• Solicit Feedback
• Identify Triggers
• Practice Reflection

 
Solicit Feedback – Soliciting feedback from direct reports can be difficult, but friends and collogues can also offer valuable information about emotions not easily self-recognized. Ask questions such as: What can I do better as a leader? What do you think triggers an emotional response from me? What is the one thing I could easily change to be more approachable? The responses may or may not surprise you, but this exercise will provide better insight on how your responses effect other people, and what you can do to improve.
 
Identify Triggers – Physical responses to difficult situations such as stress may increase your heart rate, cause you to perspire, or produce warmth over your face.  Be aware of these physical warnings because they signal an emotional trigger and a precursor to what will likely be an unfortunate response. If you are not consciously aware of what others do or say that push your buttons, know when to pause and think about what you want to say before you say it out loud. As the saying goes, the spoken word can never be taken back.
 
Practice Reflection – At the end of each day try to reflect on all the events that took place while at work and ask yourself: What could I have done better? No doubt one or two events will stand out from the rest, these are the moments to write about in a journal. Overtime, you will have produced a roadmap for understanding and managing your emotions, which eventually become a habit that leads to your overall success no matter the goal.  
 
For some people thinking rationally comes naturally, but everyone has a limit that can be pushed to its breaking point. Leaders cannot afford an impolite or unprofessional response brought about by an emotionally charged situation. Managers and supervisors need to practice communication that produces unifying and productive relationships with even the most emotionally charged employees. In their book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0, Travis Bradbury and Jean Graves provide explanations and guidance on how to prevent emotional high jacking. Bradbury and Graves prove that people with high EQ tend to be more successful, make more money, and have longer job tenure.
 
As always, get help from a qualified HR Professional if you think your business is at risk, or needs help developing policies, procedures, and training courses for help with workplace improvement and compliance requirements.

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